I've occasionally grumbled about work here. It has continued to take up the vast majority of my time of late. Four weeks of over time later I'm dragging myself along trying to see a light at the end of the tunnel. It's rather difficult to convince myself the light is more than a cruel jerk with a Mag-Light but time will tell.
Much Ado About Nothing is the show I've been working on. The set is enormous. The drawings have been out of scale. I'm exhausted most of the time. The load in has kept us running ragged for three days straight. They've turned it into a musical. There simply isn't a silver lining on this cloud.
In any case that's my lame excuse for not keeping up with the blog. Athena and I have been trying to get a visit in with MS Scarlet, Prof Plum, and Festus for three weeks running. We weren't able to see each other at all through November. Our previous visit was relatively early in October so it's been almost two months since we've seen them. I'm expecting Festus to be applying for grad schools by the time I see him next. It's been a long time. More info on the cause for delays later. Mostly illness related on our part.
To those who have given me awards, thanks. I'll try to do something about that soon. For those who don't know I've been given the "Cherry On Top Award". . . twice. It's actually quite endearing. In any case I'm now back on the clock and must return to the stage.
I have a question for you. I lost contact with my daughter's birth father a very long time ago. Also, I forgot his last name. I have found my daughter and we have met. (closed adoption) I been trying to figure out a way to get his last names because I feel guilty that I can't give that part of my daughter's history to her. I have asked her if I ever came across him say at the grocery store would she want me to stop him to get a name and a picture and she said yes. But when I asked if she would be wanting contact if I searched him out she never really answered me. If you were in his shoes as a birthfather and one that didn't get a say in the adoption.. but found out about her later and was ticked off. Would you wanted to be found 19 years later? Knowing that there is no gaurantee that she would want more than a picture? Would you rather leave things alone or find out more. My husband isn't a birthfather says he would rather not know more.
ReplyDeleteYeah! You're back!! I know you're insanely busy and all but we missed ya.
ReplyDelete"Much Ado" as a musical? Gag. . . I love that show, and I like some musicals, but not that one - no thanks. How do you take the Bard and make him musical? Okay, there is "Kiss Me, Kate," but that's a story within a story. . .okay, rant over.
ReplyDeleteMucho ado! I was searching for a fool when I found you. Frabjous!
ReplyDeleteSorry the visiting hasn't been working out to your liking. Hang in there, I have faith things will get better in that regard. I missed you around here! Come around more often!
Birthmothertalks - I'll have to give your question more thought. Chances are pretty good that I'll actually devote a post to it as that's a REALLY good question! Here's the brief answer based upon my first thoughts:
ReplyDeleteI would want to know. It would tear me up and send me into a major tailspin trying to understand how that new information made me feel. I would still want to know. Even more than it would be difficult to know that there was a girl out there who I'd helped bring to life that I'd never know I couldn't bear the thought of that being true and not knowing it. I'd probably go so far as to attempt to make contact myself, even if only in a single letter. I'd feel I owe it to myself, to the child, and to the adoptive parents to tell my story. Even if the story weren't a good one it would still be mine.
I'm an odd duck when it comes to situations like this. I've said for years that in every situation I prefer a painful truth to a pleasant fiction. I'd rather go back to therapy, again, to deal with how tortured I feel by the truth than close my eyes to it. Worse yet is to be kept from that truth I hold so dear. Over the years I've learned that the worst disservice I can do another person is to shield him/her from the truth. My attempts to protect the ones I care about from the harsh sides of reality only hurt them and me. So it is with that understanding that I say I would want to know.
Thanks for answering my question. My daughter's birthdfather choose to just pretend I wasn't pregnant or maybe he really believed it wasn't so and we lost touch. So, he never gave permission for her to be adopted. But I didn't have much say as a 15 year old either. I think of him from time to time and wish I knew where or how to find him.
ReplyDeleteMuch Ado About Nothing as a musical? I'm with LaMira. Gag! But then again I'm one of those militant "you mess with the Bard I'll f*ckin' punch you in the face" types. That said, I'm totally jealous of what you do for a profession. I'm a thespian trapped in an engineering profession. So in reality I would donate a limb to work in theatre even if it involved dumbing Shakespeare down for the masses :)
ReplyDeleteGlad you're back :)
~Jill